These two songs, in English (as Old Norse can be as hard as Korean), feature the Baron of Thescorre (which has three ravens on its arms) repelling an invasion of the Grey Wolves of Ealdormere. It seems that such mockery has caused some folks to go a bit nuclear, and to threaten us with their verbal missiles.
I hope that you'll enjoy the results of our bardic conclave.
| Wolves Song # 1 (The Foxes Song) |
Wolves Song # 2 (The Grey Wolves Song1) |
|---|---|
| The wolves came down to sing one night They gathered in a circle in the pale moonlight The other creatures fled in fright As the wolves put up their howl, oh foul-o, growl-o The other creatures fled in fright as the wolves put up their howl-o They bayed at the man who sat in the moon While the dog ducked out with a cow and spoon Then they boarded a boat on the lake with the loons1 and they crossed the Inland Seas-o freeze-o, please-o they boarded a boat on the lake with the loons and they crossed the Inland Seas-o The wolves struck sails and manned the oars Til they beached their boat on a rocky shore For they had come to High Thescorre Where the ravens rule the roost-o Loose-o, goose-o For they had come to High Thescorre Where the ravens rule the roost-o The Grey Wolves formed up nice and neat All spiffed out from their ears to their feet For they had come to steal some meat And they were counting ku-o2 one-o, two-o For they had come to steal some meat And they were counting ku-o The Raven chief was Bobby Dubh3 The wolves all called him the Raven Boob But the Ravens knew he was nobody's noob When his armor he strapped on-o br> on-o, Don-Ho But the Ravens knew he was nobody's noob When his armor he strapped on-o The Raven troops stood to the fray The archers's arrows found their prey Soon the mighty grey wolves scurried away With new feathers in their bums-o some-o, dumb-o And the mighty grey wolves scurried away With new feathers in their bums-o Away they scampered, the puppies tamed Back across the puffin plain4 Long on lyrics, but short on brains And the Ravens drank their beer-o cheer-o, hero-o Long on lyrics, but short on brains And the Ravens drank their beer-o So to Ealdormere, let this lesson be Don't come across OUR Inland Seas Don't look to raid our ku & sheeps Or your ending will be grim-o Slim-o, trimmed-o Don't look to raid our ku & sheeps Or your ending will be grim-o |
CHORUS: For we sail cross our inland seas Come to the Grey Wolves' hall on the breeze Yes, we sail cross our inland seas To visit the grey wolves, may we sit down please? We sit in our mead hall, as your ease you take Your singing and yelling, they keep us awake You drink and carouse, as your thirst you slake! We work in the morning, you hosers! Would you please pipe down, fer Chrissake! CHORUS We are simple farmers of mutton and ku Your cattle are lowing, we hear your ku moo If you do not want them, we will take home a few Thanks for the sheep and the critters We'll sell cheeze and milk back to you CHORUS We're rowing our ships as this ditty we sing We have flaming grenades to toss from our slings Because you have no doorbell for our King to ring Your city walls seem to be burning You're lucky - marshmellows we bring CHORUS Your Aethelmearc cousins have come home to roost We bring back the ravens your grey wolves have loosed As we're hunting for loons, beaver, and squirtlemoose2 We hope you like our Southern comfort It may give your spirits a boost! CHORUS TWICE |
1 - loons - Ealdormereans, from the totemic bird on their money.
2 - ku - cattle/cows from the Old Norse kus, kus! cow, cow! a milkmaid's call and the English moo! moo!.
3 - Bobby Dubh - "Black Bobby" from the names of the three ravens on Thescorre's banner: Hugin, Munin, and, of course Bob.
4 - puffin plain - a kenning for the sea.
Wolves Song # 2
1 - The Grey Wolves Song - The original melody for this Wolves Song is the iconic The Wolves Song written by Master Hector of the Black Height.
2 - squirtlemoose - the product of the genetic experiments in Great White Northern Cross-Breeding. Behold the Mighty Squirlemoose!
Like Them? Hate Them? Ready For CROSS-BORDER BARDIC RUGGERS?
Please leave a comment below or send me e-mail. Thank you!
I'm not sure if I'm more impressed by the usage of noob in #1 or hosers in #2.
ReplyDeleteThey both made me laugh which is a wonderful thing indeed.
-Padraig O'Branduibh
We try. I wrote these both whilst sitting in a Dunkin Donuts in Canandaigua, NY. It's a good thing I wasn't in a Tim Horton's. Tim's ghost would probably have high-sticked me into next year.....
ReplyDelete